After embracing a sober lifestyle, you continue to live well and treat family and friends as they should be treated. You can’t erase the past, but with long-term sobriety, you can rebuild trust, repair relationships, and be close to your loved ones again. Living amends can take a lot of time but can be some of the most rewarding. Having a sponsor helps with the ninth step, as sponsors work side-by-side with recovering alcoholics and help determine how to handle making amends.
The Benefits of Having a Recovery Mentor or Sponsor
This can be very painful to realize, but there’s no way to force a relationship with someone who’s been burned one too many times. Some people may come back eventually, but only after plenty of time to ensure recovery is going to be for the long haul. The long-term benefits of forgiveness extend beyond emotional healing. Studies indicate that forgiveness can positively impact physical health, reducing blood pressure and enhancing overall well-being. The Stanford Forgiveness Project highlighted that participants experienced significant mental health improvements and reported lower levels of anger and hurt.
- Words will only go so far and remember that not everyone is quick to forgive and move on.
- It involves making changes to one’s behavior and lifestyle to demonstrate a commitment to personal growth and recovery.
- Making amends in recovery is challenging, and individuals in recovery may encounter various obstacles.
What is Step 8 in the 12-Step program?
Before engaging in a potentially heavy conversation, utilize coping strategies to stay grounded. Coping Ahead involves visualizing a successful interaction, which can help reduce anxiety. Practicing what you want to say can also clarify your feelings and enhance your communication. Techniques like the DEAR MAN from dialectical behavior therapy can guide the conversation to ensure it’s constructive and focused on mutual understanding without blame. To approach someone to make amends, it’s crucial to choose a time when they are likely to be open to conversation.
Addiction Treatment Programs
The times they hurt people, were absent, or caused pain to loved ones is not easy to face. The person may not even remember the incidents in question from memory, but others may remember them quite well. What comes up may be feelings of guilt, shame, or something else entirely. The theme of making amends is forgiveness, and although it is one of the steps people may not like, it comes at this point in the AA journey for a reason. It means the person has come to a point where they are ready to move forward through this step, but it takes some finesse to do it without causing more harm to loved ones.
- The person may need to know the hurt will never be caused again before working on trust.
- It’s also important to take great care when making amends to someone who is in active addiction because our primary responsibility is to safeguard our own health and recovery from substance abuse.
- Understanding that relapse can be part of the healing process allows individuals to treat themselves with kindness instead of self-criticism.
Explore Robert Downey Jr.’s inspiring journey from drug addiction to triumphant recovery. Explore effective strategies for recovery during the holidays and celebrate sobriety with confidence and support. Discover the best resources for drug addiction, from rehab programs to government assistance. Some people may respond positively, while others may be resistant or emotionally charged. It’s important marijuana addiction to maintain emotional equilibrium in such scenarios. Equipped with coping mechanisms, such as visualizing a positive outcome or practicing self-soothing techniques, can help navigate the unpredictability of responses.
Approaching step nine can spread anxiety and fear in the hearts of many of those going through the AA program. This is true regardless of whether you choose to take the living or the direct routes. If you’re struggling to overcome these obstacles, don’t hesitate to reach out for support. Your NA sponsor, fellow group members, or a therapist can offer guidance and encouragement. Your efforts to make living amends amends may not always go as well as you hope. Try not to respond with anger or defensiveness if others aren’t responsive to your efforts.
True changes show that the person is serious and is working little by little to shift towards a positive space with all involved. It is worth it to cross the bridge on the journey of healing towards making amends. It does not mean it will all go smoothly but at least being sincere and honest will go a long way towards reconciling those important family relationships. Every person travels it differently, with unique experiences and opportunities. When a loved one is in recovery, they are working on their mind, body, and spiritual connection to themselves and others. Part of this experience is rebuilding family connections through amends.
With patience and the right approach, both the individual in recovery and their loved ones can move towards a healthier, more harmonious future. Addiction profoundly affects both the individual struggling with substance use and their loved ones. It often leads to broken promises, damaged relationships, and eroded trust, creating a profound sense of betrayal among family and friends. Recovery from addiction involves more than just achieving sobriety; it requires a dedicated effort to make amends and rebuild trust with those who have been hurt. This journey is not only essential for personal healing but also for strengthening the supportive networks that are crucial for sustained recovery.
This ensures we take accountability and make positive changes without causing additional harm in our recovery while making amends to https://mesti.gov.gh/alcohol-drug-rehabs-in-kentucky/ such people we cannot make direct amends to. In recovery, we can make an indirect amend with a person we harmed in the past, who since passed away, by volunteering time to a cause they truly cared about in their life. To make direct amends, it is important we are willing to make amends to the person face-to-face, no matter what happens, and respond in love and tolerance to anything they say. These interactions foster sincerity and openness, essential for the healing process. Making amends can often stir feelings of fear and shame, which may hinder a person’s ability to reach out. Acknowledging these emotions is the first step toward overcoming them.
Recognizing those harmed by addiction
Honesty is key in determining impactful living amends, which require ongoing effort and dedication to show real transformation. When direct or indirect amends aren’t enough, living amends are about changing your behavior for the long term. This means living in a way that reflects your commitment to recovery and personal growth.